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E is for Edgeplay

Edgeplay is BDSM sex that can create stimulation and pleasure through the use of knives, ropes, temperature, and more. Here’s what to know.

Photo: Eugenia Porechenskaya via Shutterstock

Are you the sort of person who likes to push limits, take risks, and live life on the edge… in the bedroom? If so, then you might want to learn more about BDSM edgeplay—a highly subjective and widely varied form of kinky sex that encompasses many different types of fetishes and types of fucking.

Edgeplay is ultimately a catchall term but one that essentially means, according to erotic educator and founder of Organic Loven Taylor Sparks, “to push or be pushed beyond your comfort zone.” Edgeplay involves taking some sexual risks and identifying personal limitations to achieve new levels of stimulation, arousal, and pleasure. It could be about inflicting pain to achieve an orgasm, sub/dom power exchanges, rope or knife play, temperature play, breath play, as well as many other types of BDSM sex acts.

No matter if you are interested in introducing edgeplay during sex with your partner or partners—or if you want to try it out when getting off alone—learn what it entails… and be aware of the risks.

What Constitutes Edgeplay?

Firstly, edgeplay can be extremely dangerous, with one of the riskiest sex acts being breath play, where choking or oxygen deprivation occurs during sex or masturbation (here’s a whole post on the topic). As such, enthusiastic consent between all partners is an absolute must.

What Some Forms of Edgeplay Sex Involve:

  • Knife Play

Knife Play is a form of BDSM kink that involves using knives, swords, daggers, and other sharp objects to enhance sexual sensation, cause pain, or create fear. It can include intentional cutting but usually doesn’t. This is a higher-risk form of kink that can cause serious injury—it’s recommended that BDSM newbies don’t engage in this type of sex without training and instruction.

  •  Temperature Play

This BDSM sensual play involves using substances or objects (think of an ice cube) to trigger the body’s neuroreceptors and deliver an erotic effect. With this form of BDSM, you can engage in both hot and cold play—so where there’s ice, there’s fire (which, again, is high risk).

  • Rope Play

Rope play is a form of BDSM bondage sex, sometimes called Shibari or Kinbaku. Dom/sub power dynamics are a big part of Rope BDSM, and one partner will use a restraint to restrict the other’s movement or wrap and suspend them into different positions while fucking them or stimulating them in their pussy or ass. Again, it’s essential to be trained in this type of BDSM kink to ensure safety while also achieving sexual satisfaction.

These are just a few variations of edgeplay, and with any type of BDSM sex, it is vital to establish boundaries, know what each sex partner is comfortable with and what is off limits, and identify a safe word or visual cue in case something has gone too far and someone wants to stop.

Clarissa, 26, has enjoyed different forms of BDSM kink for several years but only pursues it with experienced partners.

“I don’t mind edgeplay fucking, but I am picky about what I am open to during sex. Temperature play is probably one of my favorites, simply because the risk is lower, but the intensity is high. My favorite thing to do here is use a chilled dildo, the sensation of it in my pussy is incredible, and the best part is I can do it with another person or on my own.”

However, Clarissa advises you to remember that freezer burn can still be a thing.

Are Edgeplay and Edging Different Types of Sex?

Yes, they are, even though they sound similar. Edging refers to either making yourself or your partner delay cumming for as long as possible to have a more intense orgasm. Edging is a form of tantric sex and, frankly, much safer than edgeplay overall. Edging can be a hot and incredibly satisfying way to amplify just how powerful an orgasm is as well as how long it lasts.

Getting Started with Edgeplay

As with any form of kink, edgeplay requires deep levels of consent, communication, and understanding between partners. It isn’t recommended for a one-night stand or random sex with a stranger who you just met. It requires a deep level of trust.

If you are interested in edgeplay, make sure you discuss the following with your partner before sex:

  • Your comfort level and what “the edge” is for you.
  • The type of experience you want to have and if you want to be the giver or receiver.
  • Talk through every situation that might arise (and don’t be afraid to use your imagination).
  • What does a satisfying experience look like for you?
  • What are your safe words, signals, and plans if something goes south?

The bottom line? Before attempting, figure out what intrigues you about edgeplay and why you find it hot. The sexiest way to experience this type of BDSM fucking is always to know the pros and the cons.  And if you want to see how experienced and consenting kink lovers do it, spend some time watching BDSM porn.

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