We’ve explored the topic of being a bi-curious woman intrigued by the idea of having sex with another woman. And while we emphasize just how normal and hot of a desire that is for many women, you might indeed have some other questions about what it’s like to get wet and nasty and turn your fantasies into real girl-on-girl fucking.
Let’s discuss some common questions about how to have the best sex with a woman—and how to get the most enjoyment and satisfaction out of lesbian sex play.
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What Does “Lesbian Sex” Actually Mean?
Before getting down and dirty with the Q&A, let’s provide a quick definition.
Lesbian sex means sex between two women, even if those women don’t identify with the term lesbian. The women involved self-identify as women—be they cis or transgender. They could be bisexual, pansexual, queer, or heterosexual.
Just remember that sexuality is yours to explore however you want to, and so long as you and your partner are on the same page in terms of what you want to get out of sex, then go for it.
Also, lesbian sex can be anything. It can be fingering; it can be scissoring; it can be oral; it can be anal; it could be all of this combined with a strap-on dildo or other toys. Whatever makes you cum or feel erotic while you’re with a woman is lesbian sex.
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Is Using a Dildo with a Woman Different Than Fucking a Guy?
Of course, it’s different because women and men are different. They smell different, feel different, move differently, and approach sex play and fucking differently.
While you might only be experienced with dick and pussy intercourse, the fact of the matter is that sex can be just as satisfying and intense when one partner is fucking you with a strap-on or making you cum while pushing a dildo into your vagina and licking your clit with their tongue.
A dildo, at the end of the day, isn’t a dick. And if you want to have sex with a woman, likely, you aren’t looking for cock to be involved in this real-life fantasy.
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What About the Emotional Connection?
Many bi-curious women operate under the assumption that because there isn’t a dick inside of a vagina, there might not be as much of an emotional connection during sex with a woman.
That is simply not true.
Look, any guy can shove his dick in you and pump away—but I think our culture and society prove that this does not guarantee an emotionally satisfying experience.
Women have to work harder. They have to get more personal and explore each other’s bodies with hands and mouths, which can offer a more intense physical connection and amplify emotions.
Plus, know that women can be more intuitive in bed than men. After all, it’s likely a woman has explored her own pussy before she attempts to take a deep dive into another. There’s a greater chance that she knows what another woman wants.
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Does All Lesbian Sex Involve Scissoring?
No, not all sex between women involves rubbing pussies, sometimes called “tribbing.” There are many ways to have sex. However, when you can sync your bodies and move cohesively with your partner, scissoring is fucking hot.
But just like with straight sex, there are tons of sex positions to explore.
Maria, 28, remembers the first time she had sex with a woman—and this misconception.
“When I first had sex with Alli, I was operating under some misconceptions about what it meant to fuck a woman—she also was aware that this was my first time.”
Alli ultimately encouraged Maria to experiment and figure out what she liked.
“We did try scissoring, and I was shocked by just how hard I came—but it was also a totally new experience to me; I’d never fucked that way before, and the sensation of our two pussies being pushed together, feeling that close to her… it was powerful. I recommend it.”
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Do There Have to Be Gender Roles During Sex?
Are you asking if you have to be the “guy” and the other woman the “girl” when you’re in bed?
No, this isn’t the case.
There may be a top and a bottom (or not!). There might be an alpha and a beta… just like any other sexual relationship or rendezvous. Just know that penetration is not necessarily central to the female orgasm.
But there isn’t a hard and fast rule. Just explore what you like, what turns you on, what makes you cum, what gives your partner pleasure.
Sex Between Women is Not One-Size-Fits-All
Just like other types of fucking, there’s no one way to do it. The same goes for fantastic sex between women. No matter if you like it hard, soft, or every which way in between, the only way you can understand and identify your desires is by delicious trial and error.
Talk with your partner, watch erotic films together, experiment with different types of toys, and explore your fantasies.
Sex of any sort is a skill—and you only get better with tons of practice. What better time to start than right now?